weird search term

I learned today that this blog is first on the list when you Google search "see jay-z stick where he pee at in the toilet." It takes you to this post. 

Very interesting.

a monday mess

Last night Z-Dub's cousins were over. They played upstairs in his room before heading downstairs for dinner. Later, when we took Z-Dub up for his shower, we found his bathroom floor flooded. They had messed with the toilet and it overflowed. Believe me when I say mopping toilet water is no picnic.

Of course, I launched a full investigation, complete with a heated interrogation of Z-Dub. At first he blamed everyone but himself. Later, upon full examination of the evidence I figured it out and was able to coerce a confession out of the little culprit. Apparently his cousin and he decided to fill the commode with toilet paper and flush it. Obviously it couldn't handle the mass quantities of soggy paper.

He was charged, tried and convicted in the court of Daddy and sentenced to bed.

On a side note, when I arrived home I changed into one of my old t-shirts. Z-Dub asked what it said below the picture. I replied "don't spank the monkey." Later he told HotMomma "no spanking the monkey!!!" Then, even later, The Deuce spit up on my monkey shirt.

Yep, it was another interesting Monday night in our house.

burn

My stepmother was in town visiting this weekend. She was shopping for houses here in Las Vegas as she plans to relocate from neighboring California in the not-to-distant future. She loves our neighborhood, so she stopped by the sales office and toured a few model homes and picked up a price sheet. When she brought the sales figures back to show us I almost had a frickin' heart attack.

Our house, the one we bought one year ago next week, is now selling for $100,000 less than what we bought it for. To make matters worse, houses that are double and even triple the size of our's, houses that HotMomma really, really wanted, but we couldn't afford at the time, are now selling for less than what we bought our's for. This doesn't make HotMomma happy. She's been complaining (every day) about how cramped we are with the addition of The Deuce.

Of course, I'd love to take advantage of the new low prices on the bigger houses, but I obviously can't sell our's for a long, long time. I can keep our current house and buy an additional one, but we don't have enough cash saved up to do that right now.

THIS SUCKS!!!! STUPID ECONOMY!!!!

But, hey, at least we have a roof over our head.

it's his filipinoness

The Deuce had his second month doctor's appointment on Friday. As we expected, he's healthy, happy and growing great. He had another round of immunization shots, so yesterday he had a low-grade fever for the first time in his life, but he handled it like a champ.

The interesting part of these early doctor appointments are the body measurement results that let you know where your baby's growth and stature stands when compared to the average child. I guess some brainiacs in the government or some medical consortium got together, worked some numbers and came up with the formula to show what they think is "normal." With all of the measurements 50 percent is ideal.

The Deuce is quite a heavy child, so his 13 lbs. 11 ozs. weight wasn't a huge surprise. He ranks in the 86th percentile in the weight category. Yep, he's chubby. His head circumference ranked almost in the middle at 45 percent. But it was his height that really shocked us. He only measured 22 inches long, which places him in the measly 11th percentile. Yep, he's chubby....and a shorty. However, he is half Filipino, which isn't exactly the tallest of ethnicities. I guess the Filipino genes are stronger in Deuce. No multi-million dollar NBA contract for him. Now we think Z-Dub, on the other hand, is quite tall. However, his measurements were always right about 49 percent, which is just average.

However, in the end it doesn't matter if our kids are tall, short, big or small, we love them just the same.

a much needed break

The arrival of Friday couldn't come at a better time. I'm watching the clock and eagerly waiting for the end of the work day. To say it's been a trying week is an understatement. Work has been insanely busy and the added stress of worrying about our nephew has left me exhausted. I'm sure HotMomma feels the same way.

Now that the weekend is upon us, it's time to let loose and have some fun. We're going to party tonight. I'm having a drink few drinks. I may even get brave and sing a little Karaoke. That will definitely require more than one drink.There's some stiff competition among a group of friends to score a 100 on the system. Only one person has accomplished this so far. The song was Zombie by the Cranberries and she sings it amazingly. Of course, we think she practices a lot during the day, which gives her a huge advantage over the rest of us talentless fools.

Good food, good drinks, good company and crazy fun is exactly what we need tonight.

We also have family visiting this weekend, so hopefully we can plan something adventurous to do.

surgical success

I've received word from my sister that CK is out of surgery and is recovering in the PICU. As far as they can tell his aortic repair was successful. He's in stable condition, however, they have him on medication for high blood pressure. He's semi-alert, but sedated, and his color looks great. A good sign is the fact that at one point he woke up and was trying to pull out all his tubes and was crying "boo-boo!" Right now they have cartoons on to comfort him.

He's on the road to recovery before his next surgery in about four to six weeks when he'll undergo a mitral valve catheter balloon valvuloplasty.

Thanks again to everyone who donated to the fund to help my sister out. We're still collecting, of course. I'd especially like to thank The Microbiologist for helping spread the word.

I will update when I have more information.

------------------------------------

Update at 8 p.m. - I spoke with my mother and she reports that CK's blood pressure is back to normal. He's resting comfortably. She also noted that for the first time in his life his feet are warm. Because of his heart conditions, he's always had circulation problems. His feet would often be blue and were never warm like normal. This is great news.

------------------------------------

Update at 10:40 a.m. on Jan. 23 - I got an update on CK's condition. He's recovering well from his open heart surgery. He's in a lot of pain so they're administering drugs every four hours. The doctors did an Echo of his heart and discovered that the situation with his Mitral Valve has worsened, so they've already scheduled him for his second surgery during the first week in March.

wordless wednesday...but not really

Z-Dub Sings from VegasDad on Vimeo.

a new day

"The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness." - President Barack Obama, Jan. 20, 2009.

update on ck

As many of you are aware, CK's first heart surgery was delayed due to hospital logistics at Duke University last week. He's been officially rescheduled for his end to end aortic coarctation repair on Wednesday. He has a repeat series of pre-op appointments tomorrow before the big day.

I've been thinking about my sister and her husband and their kids and how they are dealing with all of this. I can't even imagine Z-Dub and Deuce having a life threatening condition requiring multiple surgeries that are life threatening in themselves. They're damned if they do and damned if they don't. They can sit back and watch their son's health deteriorate as he ages or they can take a huge risk and subject him to heart surgeries. Never mind the financial strain that goes along with it. But I know that if I was in a similar situation, I'd spend every dime to save my child.

Thankfully, people have been giving. We've raised about $2,000 in just a few days. This money will help them with expenses as they are missing a lot of work and having to commute back and forth to Durham from the North Carolina coast, as well as medical bills. It's not a whole lot, but every little bit helps.

Thankfully, to ease some of the stress, my sister and CK have been given a room at the Ronald McDonald House in Durham. They are there now.

If you'd like to donate a little money to help them out, please consider it. Thanks.

where's vegasdad?/special thanks

I've jumped ship today and headed over to Fear & Parenting in Las Vegas to guest post. Actually, it's my first time guest posting, so I expect you to visit the site. 

------------------------------------------

But real quick, before I leave, I also would like to offer my thanks and gratitude to all of you that donated money to help out my sister and her family. The efforts of my brother, along with readers of this blog, raised just under $2,000 in just three days. Amazing! This money will certainly help my sister and her family has they struggle to save the life of their beautiful two-year-old boy.

Of course, we are continuing to collect donations, because the expenses they're facing are astronomical. I'll be providing an update on how the monies collected benefit the family.

Again, thank you!

Have a great Sunday!

Horton Who?

The phone rings.

“Ahhh, Jay. What’s that bideo you want for Janoe?” (That’s what she calls Z-Dub)

“He wants Horton Hears a Who,” I reply.

Confused, she asks “What? Horton Hears What?”

“A who!”

“Who?”

“Horton Hears a Who!”

“Horton who?”

“It’s the name of the movie. Horton Hears a Who,” I say clearly and concisely.

“Hears who?”

“No Mom, it’s the name of the movie. It’s Dr. Suess.”

“Who?”

“You know Dr. Suess. He wrote Green Eggs and Ham.”

“What’s that? How do you spell that doctor?”

“S-U-E-S-S.”

“Okay, S-U…what’s the rest?”

“Actually, that’s not important. The DVD box is orange and has an elephant on it. It’s called Horton Hears a Who?”

“Who?”

What you’ve just read is a conversation that was played out several times over the course of a month with my Filipina mother-in-law as she attempted to purchase a DVD for her grandson. She cracks us up.

This guy understands the humor…

a broken heart

My sister's two-year-old son, our nephew, CK has a very rare heart condition called Shone's Complex, which is essentially a mess of congenital heart defects (mitral stenosis, coarctation of the aorta, bilateral superior vena cava, and bicuspid aortic valve). It was diagnosed when he was just 12 months old. It's a very serious condition.

Why am I telling you this?

His condition is worsening, so today at 11 a.m. EST CK is having heart surgery at Duke University. He will undergo an end to end aortic coarctation repair. But that's not the end of it for now. In four to six weeks he will receive a mitral valve catheter balloon valvuloplasty. Both surgical procedures are Greek to me, and probably to you, but we all will agree that anytime you subject a child (or anyone) to heart surgery, it's scary. Unfortunately, these two procedures won't be the end of his surgeries. There may be many more to come in the near and distant future.

I know most of you don't know him, but if you can please send us your prayers, thoughts, good vibes, etc.

Now, switching gears a bit.

The financial burden of CK's condition for my sister and her husband is enormous. The cost of the surgeries is absolutely astonishing, but also add in the lost wages from missing work and travel cost to and from Duke University. The hospital is a three hour drive each way from their home. Both my sister and her husband lack the benefits at their employers to get paid time off.

So to offset some of these costs, my twin brother is offering his tech expertise for free, but asking for a donation in exchange. It can be as low as $1 or as high as you can afford. He's got 15 years of IT experience and is a wealth of knowledge. Some examples of what he can help you with include:

• Solutions for various Virus/Malware related problems
  
• Various PC software recommendations
  
• Application help
  
• Mac OS X
  
• General computer questions
  
• Home/business networking (wireless)
  
• PC or Network security tips or tricks

I normally wouldn't post a plea like this, but it's for CK, my sister, her husband and CK's big brother as well as the rest of our family. Visit TechGuardians.com to take advantage of the tech advice and please, if you can, donate just a little bit to help out my sister. Even if you don't need advice, a small donation is appreciated.

Thank You!

-------------------------------------------------------

Update at 10:19 a.m. - I just got word from my sister that CK's surgery has been postponed until next week. This was the result of both a newborn and a child brought in by life flight admitted into the Cardiac ICU at Duke this morning. There was no longer a pediatric ICU bed to accommodate CK after surgery. The  hospital had no choice but the postpone.

This is actually a great example of the financial stress my sister and her family are experiencing. After traveling three hours to Duke a couple of days ago and spending money on gasoline and hotel as well as missing work, the surgery has been delayed. This will result in further expense next week when they have to repeat everything.

Thanks to all of you who have contributed already. Our family appreciates your generosity.

Read more updates on CK's condition HERE.

wordless wednesday: looking back...way back

I'm always showing pictures of the kids, so I thought for a change I'd post a montage of me as a young lad. So here I am in the1970s and 80s.

garbage can bandit strikes

This morning Las Vegas law enforcement authorities revealed that a local celebrity has fallen victim to the Garbage Can Bandit. The still unknown perpetrator has wreaked havoc on local neighborhoods over the past few weeks, which has local residents fearing for their sanitation.

According to Detective Herman Odorwitz, chief investigator with Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department’s Priority Victims Division, the incident took place Saturday when blogger VegasDad placed his garbage receptacle on the curb in front of his estate. Later, when he returned to retrieve it, the receptacle was nowhere to be found. Sensing something amiss, VegasDad immediately contacted police.

“That [expletive] bandit stole my [expletive] trash can. I just can’t believe the bandit would strike in my neighborhood. It's in the hills. What the [expletive]?” said a bewildered VegasDad in newly released 911 transcripts. “Now I have no idea where I’m going to discard my [expletive] uneaten caviar and empty Starbucks cups.”

According to an unidentified witness, it appeared that VegasDad was targeted because of his celebrity. However, Odorwitz says that claim appears to be unsubstantiated at this point in the investigation.

“We’ve gotten a lot of calls on our special tip line and we’re following up on every lead,” said Odorwitz. “We urge anyone who saw or knows anything about this heinous crime to call in. We can use the help.”

Odorwitz also made a plea to the local community to avoid VegasDad's neighborhood. Since reports of the theft have been made public throngs of onlookers have converged in the area to catch a glimpse of the celebrity victim.

"We need to respect VegasDad's and his family's privacy as they cope with their loss," said Odorwitz. "There are paparazzi and groupies all over the place today, which is creating a driving hazard and disrupting the neighbors."

A Z-list celebrity, VegasDad rose to fame a three years ago when he made his mark in the blogging world by exploiting his family. His first blog, rothfamilyadventures.com, was canceled in May 2008. The following month, the resilient blogger was cast in ivegasfamily.com where he has received critical acclaim.

Rumors of impending book, movie and television deals inked by the star have been making headlines in gossip magazines over the past few months. There’s no word yet on how Saturday’s tragedy will impact his future projects.

dream job at last

I woke up this morning to find that my dream job  is finally available. I shall apply immediately. I hope I get an interview.

I wonder if I can bring the family?

gettin' it done

Although I definitely am not lazy given the fact that we have a rambunctious two-year-old and an eight-week-old infant to care for, but I feel as though I've dropped the ball in writing for Uptake.com . The recent change in our family dynamic and the fact that my daytime job has been extremely busy has stolen time from me. I should also add that the hectic holidays didn't help. I was cranking out at least two articles a week prior to the birth of Deuce. In December I only wrote two. Now that it's a new year and I resolve to step it up and start producing. I'm sure Whit (the boss man) will appreciate it.


Off to a smashing start, yesterday I wrote this gem and posted it today. Please check it out. It's about a little local lake.

toddler speak: morning drive edition

It's amazing what comes out a two-year-old's mouth. This morning, during our short commute, Z-Dub was just yapping away. I couldn't help but to laugh at what he had to say.

Z-Dub: "Daddy, you're driving to fast!"

Me: "No I'm not. I'm going to the speed limit?"

Z-Dub: "No Daddy. Slow down or you go time out." With finger up like he's scolding me.


About 30 seconds later...

Z-Dub: "Daddy, why you drive so slow?"

Z-Dub: "What's that noise. Daddy, you farted?"

Me: "No, that's just the sound of the bus."

Z-Dub: "Poo poo is going to come out now."

Me: "I didn't fart. It was the bus."

Z-Dub: "No Daddy. You farted. You going to poo poo. You go poo poo in the toilet or no candy for  you."

tagged

I've been tagged by DC Urban Dad, so I'm now obligated to participate in a little meme action. Luckily it's an easy one. The rules are:

1. Go to your documents
2. Go to your 6th file.
3. Go to your 6th picture.
4. Blog about it.
5. Tag 6 friends to do the same.
   

Now, I did have to cheat a little because I'm doing this at work (during my lunch break) and the sixth file in My Documents contains my department budget and no pictures. I'm really not about to take a screen shot of a spreadsheet. That would be just boring. And you'll laugh at the numbers. So I skipped to the seventh file which was actually My Pictures. The sixth picture is this:

This is a picture I took of the Buddha statue at the Japanese Tea Garden in Golden Gate Park in San Francisco in 2003 (before kids) when HotMomma and I traveled there frequently during the hot summer months. The statue was presented to the garden in 1949, the S. & G. Gump Company in memory of A. Livingston Gump, Alfred Gump and William Gump. It is located at the eastern end of the Long Bridge. It was cast in bronze on Honshu Island at Tajima, Japan in 1790; it weighs 3,000 pounds and is ten feet, eight inches high. This particular figure is named Amazarashi-No-Hotoke, meaning "The Buddha that sits throughout the sunny and rainy weather without a shelter," which is right on considering its location in the park.


Now the fun part is picking six bloggers to tag. After careful thought (random choosing from by blog roll) here are the tagged (you're welcome):

Dan from Daddy Dan 
Ed from Zoe's Dad 
ZakaryW from Shindig 
Gini from Tao of Gini 
Shelly from Seriously, Shelly 
Rich from Untangling Fatherhood 

Have fun with it.

wordless wednesday: the new bouncy seat

food thief

Z-Dub is always stealing food off my plate. Even when he has the same exact food on his plate, he's more interested in mine than his. To keep his little fingers out of my food, lately I've employed a new strategy focused on convincing him that his food is way better than mine.

I started telling Z-Dub that the food on my plate is poop. Yep, poop. Even if it looks like his, smells like his, and I'm eating it, I still tell him its poop and its yucky.

"Ewwwwhhhh! Daddy's eating poop," he yells out.

But lately this new strategy has started to fail me, especially since he'll eat basically anything.

I think I'll have to explore an even newer strategy. Perhaps something more simple. 

Maybe not sitting next to him at the table will be the best way to deal with his food thievery.

let me tell you a little secret...

The most challenging part of parenthood is not caring for a helpless infant or learning how to effectively discipline a toddler who is testing your authority. Nor is it the lack of sleep or a social life.

The most challenging part is POTTY TRAINING. I have never, ever encountered anything so frustrating in my life. Seriously, how hard could it be? Just point and shoot.

I've cleaned many puddles already today and I'm sure there will be many, many more. Luckily we haven't encountered any muddy messes yet.

pussifying my boy and phone books

Z-Dub is constantly surrounded by girls. His cousins that live nearby are girls and our neighbors' kids are all girls, so he obviously is influenced by them. Lately he's been spending a lot of time at his Grandma's house playing with the girls. Over there the other day, prompted by his older cousin, I witnessed him playing with dolls and carrying a purse on his shoulder. I understand that's what the girls want to play and he's greatly outnumbered, so I didn't let it bother me.

However, later when we got got home and got him ready to take a shower, I noticed that someone at the house painted his toe nails. That's where I draw a line. I asked him who did it and he replied "Grandma." And apparently this isn't the first time she's done this. He and Deuce are her only grandsons. She had only daughters and up until both of the boys arrived, she only had granddaughters. I can understand how she may not know how to play with boys, but I'm going to have a little talk with her and hopefully the nail painting will not be happening again. I better do it soon, because it wouldn't surprise me if things escalate and I go to pick him up and find him wearing a girl's dress.

It's unfortunate that on my side of the family there are primarily boys and he rarely gets to play with or see them because of distance. I think he'd have fun with them if he only could.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Why do the telephone companies bother delivering phone directories anymore? It's a huge waste of trees if you ask me. Mine goes straight from the front porch into the recycling bin. All the information I need can be found on the Internets. I think the books should be by request only instead of just delivered to those who don't want them.

100 things

I was watching that movie Bucket List yesterday and it reminded me that Daddy Dan posted this list of 100 accomplishments recently. After reading it I wondered how many I've accomplished/experienced so far in my life. With it being the start of a new year, I thought I'd embark on the tedious task of reviewing the list and seeing how I fare. Perhaps some can be accomplished in 2009 as resolutions.

Like Dan, items in bold are those that I have accomplished/experienced. Items in red are ones that I wish to accomplish in my lifetime. Items in green are those that I wish to accomplish in this new year.

1. Started my own blog
   
2. Slept under the stars
   
3. Played in a band
   
4. Visited Hawaii
   
5. Watched a meteor shower
   
6. Given more than I can afford to charity
   
7. Been to Disneyland/World
   
8. Climbed a mountain
   
9. Held a praying mantis
   
10. Sung a solo - Does American Idol Encore on Wii count?
    
11. Bungee jumped
    
12. Visited Paris
    
13. Watched lightning at sea
    
14. Taught myself an art from scratch
    
15. Adopted a child
    
16. Had food poisoning
    
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
    
18. Grown my own vegetables
    
19. Seen the Mona Lisa
    
20. Slept on an overnight train
    
21. Had a pillow fight
    
22. Hitchhiked - I've watched too many horror flicks to know not to do that.
    
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
    
24. Built a snow fort
    
25. Held a lamb
    
26. Gone skinny dipping
    
27. Run a Marathon
    
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice - I've ridden them in Vegas though.
    
29. Seen a total eclipse
    
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
    
31. Hit a home run
    
32. Been on a cruise
    
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
    
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors - I'm a mutt, so where do I begin? It'll be easier to visit HotMomma's ancestor's birthplace.
    
35. Seen an Amish community
    
36. Taught myself a new language
    
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
    
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
    
41. Sung karaoke - I'm part of a Filipino family, so of course.
    
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
    
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
    
44. Visited Africa
    
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
    
46. Been transported in an ambulance - I hope this never, ever happens.
    
47. Had my portrait painted - That is if I accomplish something great. Perhaps I should run for President.
    
48. Gone deep sea fishing
    
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
    
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris - Again, does the one in Vegas count?
    
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
    
52. Kissed in the rain
    
53. Played in the mud
    
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
    
55. Been in a movie
    
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
    
57. Started a business
    
58. Taken a martial arts class
    
59. Visited Russia
    
60. Served at a soup kitchen
    
61. Sold Girl Scout cookies - I've eaten my share.
    
62. Went Whale Watching
    
63. Got flowers for no reason
    
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma - Only to myself, pre-op.
    
65. Gone sky diving
    
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
    
67. Bounced a check - Not proud of it. I was young.
    
68. Flown in a helicopter - My dad had a friend who was a helicopter pilot. I remember flying over Disneyland as a kid.
    
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
    
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
    
71. Eaten caviar
    
72. Pieced a quilt
    
73. Stood in Times Square
    
74. Toured the Everglades
    
75. Been fired from a job - I hope to never be.
    
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
    
77. Broken a bone - Does a fracture count?
    
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
    
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
    
80. Published a book
    
81. Visited the Vatican
    
82. Bought a brand-new car - Too many times to count. I use a broker. I highly recommend using one.
    
83. Walked in Jerusalem
    
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
    
85. Read the entire Bible - I took a Bible as literature class in college.
    
86. Visited the White House - Michael Jackson was getting some kind of honor from Ronald Reagan on the day we went.
    
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating - I buy my dead animals neatly wrapped in plastic at the grocery store.
    
88. Had chickenpox
    
89. Saved someone’s life
    
90. Sat on a jury
    
91. Met someone famous - In Vegas you run into celebs all the time. I played Blackjack with Jenny McCarthy at the Hard Rock when I was in college.
    
92. Joined a book club
    
93. Lost a loved one
    
94. Had a baby - I made two.
    
95. Seen the Alamo in person
    
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
    
97. Been involved in a law suit
    
98. Owned a cell phone - Who doesn't?
    
99. Been stung by a bee
    
100. Ridden an elephant
     

I've accomplished/experienced 43 out of 100! Not too shabby if you ask me. As you can see, I have many more on my list to do. I can't wait.

What about you?

Again, Happy New Year.